Synopsis:
Carson is upset when Anthony, his boyfriend, breaks up with him just as he's considering suggesting that they move in together. All his adult life, Carson has been well taken care of by his boyfriends, and Anthony was no exception - during the six months they were together, Anthony helped Carson pay for his food, apartment, clothes, you name it. He also saw to it that Carson got a nice job as the "eye candy" at a burlesque show, even though Carson isn't much of a dancer or singer and doesn't have the ambition or willpower necessary to get better. Carson's primary talent is looking pretty - with the way he dresses and looks, it's not an uncommon occurrence for him to be mistaken for a woman.
Without Anthony, Carson's cushy life crumbles. He doesn't know if he can afford to pay for both his rent and food, and his job at the burlesque begins to go downhill. It would all be completely depressing if it weren't for Eddie, the superintendent of his apartment building. Eddie's a manly kind of guy: bearded, good with tools, likes sports. He's not the kind of man Carson usually goes for, and he's not rich enough to give Carson the kind of lifestyle he's used to, but...he's kind, quiet, and sweet. Even though Carson and Eddie are complete opposites, they make each other happy.
Carson's not sure what to do. He loves Eddie more than he has anyone else he's ever been with, but he also knows he needs to learn to stand on his own two feet. Plus, he feels that a great guy like Eddie could do a lot better than someone like him. When Anthony offers to take him back, will Carson succumb to the temptation to go back to the life he used to have, or will he take a risk and try to aim for something better?
Commentary:
The excerpt I read intrigued me, but as I started reading this book I wondered if I had made a mistake in choosing it. Carson seemed a bit like the male version of that perky blonde rich guys always seem to keep around like pets. I was a little surprised he actually had some idea of how to put together a budget and knew what all his bills were.
Amazingly, Carson turned out to be my favorite thing about this book. Instead of being annoyed that he let things get so bad by allowing himself to be completely taken care of by all his boyfriends, I found myself amazed that he actually recognized that this wasn't the best way for him to live. Nearly everyone in his life traded sex for money and pretty things and saw nothing wrong with doing so. In fact, Carson's mother encouraged him to find someone else who could give him the life he was accustomed to and, when Anthony returned and said he'd take Carson back, Carson's mother and one of his friends were thrilled and naturally assumed he'd go back to him. When Carson tried to talk about love with his mother, she dismissed it as foolish and unnecessary.
My impression of Carson was that he was basically a really nice, vibrant person who made a lot of mistakes and was easily blinded by pretty things. As bad as I felt for him, as his life quickly fell down around his ears, I think he needed for that to happen. Had Eddie been capable of giving him all the expensive gifts he was used to, Carson would probably have slipped into a happy, blind relationship with him, once again oblivious to how helpless he was without someone to take care of him. Since Eddie couldn't do that, since Carson liked being with him anyway, and since Carson's job was quickly becoming a source of unhappiness, Carson couldn't just continue to be blind to his own problems.
